Iowa is an easy state to get married in, friends living elsewhere tell me. I'd nod my head sagely and smile, even though I did not try it myself.
Now the tables are turned on me, but good. A friend who moved away calls to keep me abreast of his love live, teaching life, joys of life, and those oh, so trying trials.
Today, he had a new wrinkle. He wants to get married, on a specific day, in a specific place in Iowa that he considers beautiful. He gives me the date, then asks for a favor.
Would I consider performing the ceremony.
Ah, does he care if the marriage is VALID anywhere? I'm laughing. I think this is a joke.
No, some thought has gone into it.
Knowing I attended a church college back in my ancient history days, he thinks I'd be ideal to get ordained and perform the service. He's sure I'd give him a good show.
I still think it is a joke.
"You are asking a single lady who never showed much inclination to give you happily ever after advice?"
"It would be a first. You could even preach at us - tell us the pitfalls/joys of the course we are embarking on."
"No, I've preached before."
"From the pulpit?"
"Yep. And I've also had a minister tell me she'd marry me on horseback, if I chose."
"What will you wear?" he asks. (He knows I'm dieting, so not all the usual suspects are assured of fitting.)
"Think of it as research for one of your novels."
"What does your mother think of this? Will she be there?"
He goes on to tell me about a friend of his from nearby whose sister got ordained and married him to his true love just last month. He adds that once I have the paperwork taken care of, I can hire out to perform marriages. He names a former student he is just sure would have me do it for him.
"Is ___ thinking of getting married, too?" I ask. Both boys are turning/have just turned 30, definitely time to get the lead out.
"Not that I know of, but once he hears you're doing it, I'm sure he'll want to use you, too. You could bury and baptize, too."
"Don't go advertising this -- I'm not sure I want a second career." I'm still laughing.
About this point, it dawns on me that he's dead serious.
Travel arrangement details are discussed...
Tomorrow, he will call back with the ordination details.
When mom suggested I write my autobiography a while back, I shrugged it off. Not much happening here...