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Thursday, July 3rd, 2003
8:29a - Off On Tangents


Wherever I happen to be when something I feel like writing about comes up, off I go, resulting in another misplaced piece, this time, in epi_lj's journal, confusing him totally.

Next week, I go to Omaha, Nebraska, in a school car for a one day seminar with one overnight. Well and good, as that is about five hours one way. But the second part of the training moves a bit further away, to Marshall, Minnesota, for a two day seminar. Again, the school will pick up the cost of an overnight and the registration fees, but being able to drive there before a meeting, attend the meeting, stay overnight, attend more meetings, then drive home is NOT an option.

Last night, a former truck driver who did "long haul over the road" got out his trusty maps/atlas, which fill a brief case, and announced the two day seminar was a "fur piece" from me, gestimating ten hours or so travel time (assuming I could keep a truck driver's pace going that long at one sitting...which at my age, is NOT assured any more, although I could do it at one time, and did, frequently).

When we got to toting up mileage on the most probable routes, it came out almost 500 miles one way! I'm sure that the offer assumed that any place in Minnesota was close enough to my sister in Rochester that a family visit would ensue, but the two are nearly 300 miles apart. I can't even go to Rochester (six hour drive one way, stay the night, drive on to the conference, and return the next day. Only the part of the route "north" is useful, as opposed, say, to her living in Illinois, with NONE of the distance in the right direction.

Duh, I should do a computer based "trip" and be sure. Well, 8 hours and 424 miles.

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8:05p - Country Life Lessons


Don't name a pig you plan to eat.
    -- Anonymous


Country fences need to be horse high, pig tight and bull strong.
    -- Anonymous


Life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce.
    -- Anonymous


Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.
    -- Anonymous


Life is simpler when you plow around the stumps.
    -- Anonymous


Mortgaging a future crop is like saddling a wobbly colt.
    -- Anonymous


A bumble bee is faster than a John Deere tractor.
    -- Anonymous


Trouble with a milk cow is she won't stay milked.
    -- Anonymous


Don't skinny dip with snapping turtles.
    -- Anonymous


Words that soak into your ears are whispered, not yelled.
    -- Anonymous


Meanness don't happen overnight.
    -- Anonymous


To know how country folks are doing, look at their barns, not their houses.
    -- Anonymous


Never lay an angry hand on a kid or an animal, it just ain't helpful.
    -- Anonymous


Teachers, bankers, and hoot owls sleep with one eye open.
    -- Anonymous


Forgive your enemies. It messes with their heads.
    -- Anonymous


Don't sell your mule to buy a plow.
    -- Anonymous


Two can live as cheap as one if one don't eat.
    -- Anonymous


Don't corner something meaner than you.
    -- Anonymous


You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar, assuming you want to catch flies.
    -- Anonymous


Man is the only critter who feels the need to label things as flowers or weeds.
    -- Anonymous


It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
    -- Anonymous


Don't go huntin' with a fellow named Chug-A-Lug.
    -- Anonymous


You can't unsay a cruel thing.
    -- Anonymous


Every path has some puddles.
    -- Anonymous


When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
    -- Anonymous


The best sermons are lived, not preached.
    -- Anonymous


Most of the stuff people worry about never happens.
    -- Anonymous


Lazy and Quarrelsome are ugly sisters.
    -- Anonymous

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